We live in a world where no one is allowed to be okay…all in the name of making sure everyone is okay. Something is supposed to upset you all the time…and what is supposed to upset you the most young man, is you. You are upsetting, so they say. The message is that you are not right…that something is always the matter. Even if you get slightly upset you are guilty of a microaggression. If you show assertiveness, you are being oppressive. You just can’t seem to get it right.
Young men need to hear that by and large they are normal. Perfectly normal. There are outliers and there are times any one of us gets out of line from time to time but for the most part what has usually been ascribed as natural parts of being male have been labeled as problematic.
Someone needs to be telling our young men that being a problem is not baked into your DNA…it is baked into the outlook of those who want to find problems in everyone and bring disruption and chaos into the systems as they have traditionally existed.
Is it possible for a young man to get out of line? Of course…but being male doesn’t make you automatically bad and it doesn’t make you toxic because you don’t live up to someone else’s expectations for what men should look like who most likely have never had a healthy male example for them to see the benefits of.
So carry on young men. Don’t let people get you down. You are just as much an image bearer with that Y chromosome as anyone else. And yes, we do need accountability for the actual moments when someone is being toxic…but you aren’t toxic for being male.
I want my two boys to understand this. I want my grand kids to understand this. I want their future wives to understand this…how are we ever going to get along until we stop demonizing people for normal things like race and gender?