The more I reflected on my spiritual journey the more I have realized that my legalism wasn’t rooted in the conservative nature of the churches I grew up in. I was more of a legalist than the preachers I grew up hearing. My legalism grew out of my own desire for assurance and certainty. This is natural when you are a child. You don’t know who you are and you have no way to assure your own survival (you can’t work and earn a living…you are at the mercy of adults). So you grasp for certainty and assurance and few things have the allure of this more than legalism.
Healing from legalism requires exploration and relationship. Once you meet the guys from the “other team” you begin to realize you are more on the same team than you realize. I found out that some of the Baptists I met loved God more than I did…it drove me back into the scriptures to see if what I believed was true. When I did this…not just to confirm my view but to affirm what the Bible actually teaches I began to find holes in my view that I could have never seen otherwise. I encountered people who had more fruit of the Spirit than I did.
As I have reflected on some of these things I decided to put my story down on video in case it is helpful to others. I cannot tell you how fortunate I am to still be around…many never made the journey but fell off on the wayside. Thank you God for your patience and for never letting me go!